Finding me again

I was quite shocked when I realised I hadn’t written a blog post on here for over two years. Today I finally tasted personal freedom. After years of emotional torment, being gaslighted, tolerating and forgiving serial liars, the final thread was cut and it felt like the noose around my neck had been removed. “I’M FREE!” my head and heart cried out. 2019… the year I got my life back and my shit together.

The last half a year I have taken time to find myself again, reignite the fire. I’m hoping to really get back into writing again now that i have the freedom and support to do so amongst all of my other activities.

I bought a new electric piano. I taught myself to play on an electric keyboard as a child but my love of music and creativity lay dormant for five years. I’m so excited to be picking this up again. You won’t exactly find me performing any time soon but the power of music can never be underestimated. This proved more true than ever when (on a major decluttering spree that would make even Marie Kondo flinch) I found my sony walkman mp4 from 2006/7. The machine may have been built to last but some of music tastes were not. However it did unearth some piano pieces I’d forgotten about. We can gloss over the extensive collection of Nickleback… it is incredible how many emotions can be invoked by listening to music.

I’ve also gotten back into drawing and painting. I have fallen back in love with watercolour pencils! So far I’ve been a total geek and my art has been heavily influenced by the world of Harry Potter but I can’t wait for spring to take myself up to Richmond Park to capture the changing colours of the forna. Incidentally I’ve headed up to the park quite frequently with my camera to get shots of the deer. They’re such beautiful and majestic creatures.

What bettee way to start a new year than with a new job! I am super excited to get into a public affairs agency having worked for politicians and inhouse for a charity.

2019 is the year I can be me again. Reigniting that 2009 fire with no one to hold me back or tell me what I can and can’t be doing with my life.

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